Explaining managed IT services (MSP) can be tricky. Even saying “Managed IT Services” usually leads to polite nods and people’s eyes quietly glazing over. But a good elevator pitch? That’s different. A great pitch can make clients laugh, stick in their memory, and make them want your services without turning the conversation into a tech snooze-fest.
Below, I’ve got 20 funny, memorable MSP elevator pitches to help break down what we do in a way that sticks. And after that, check out some classic objections you might face, along with lighthearted responses to keep things on track.
- “Think of us as aspirin for your IT headaches. You’ve got pain? We make it go away.”
- “We’re like tech ninjas: you’ll hardly know we’re there, but you’ll feel the difference.”
- “Keeping your business running like a well-oiled machine—no squeaks, no leaks.”
- “When your tech’s a wreck, we’re the fix-it pros with fast solutions and zero judgment.”
- “We’re the IT version of a security blanket—minus the lint.”
- “Imagine tech issues on mute. That’s us.”
- “We’re here so you can stop Googling, ‘why is my computer doing this?’”
- “Think of us as your digital bodyguard—without the sunglasses or attitude.”
- “Your goals are our goals. We make sure IT is the least exciting part of your day.”
- “We keep your business moving, so the only downtime you worry about is vacation.”
- “Your IT isn’t supposed to be ‘quirky’—we’ll keep it steady, stable, and secure.”
- “You do your job, we’ll make sure tech doesn’t make it harder.”
- “Tech crisis? Just think of us as your on-call emergency tech squad.”
- “Outsource your IT stress to us. You deserve a good night’s sleep.”
- “We’re the tech heroes that quietly keep your business a zero-drama zone.”
- “Let us handle the IT so you can do what you do best. We’re all about freeing up your focus.”
- “No IT mishaps on our watch. Call us the ‘silent partners’ for your success.”
- “If tech is stressing you out, it’s time to call in the pros.”
- “We turn IT chaos into calm, like a digital spa day for your business.”
- “Stop fighting with your tech. We make sure it works for you, not against you.”
Now, let’s break each of these out with common objections and responses.
“Think of us as aspirin for your IT headaches. You’ve got pain? We make it go away.”
Objection: “But what if my tech headaches aren’t that bad?”
Response: “Hey, minor headaches can turn into migraines faster than you’d think. We’re here for all levels of tech pain, from annoying hiccups to full-on meltdowns.”
Response: “Think of us as preventive aspirin. You’ll barely notice us there, but you’ll love how smooth things feel without the constant little issues.”
“We’re like tech ninjas: you’ll hardly know we’re there, but you’ll feel the difference.”
Objection: “So, I won’t even know what you’re doing?”
Response: “Exactly! We’re working quietly in the background, freeing you up to focus on your actual work. You’ll just know everything is running without a hitch.”
Response: “Just like ninjas, we’re experts at staying stealthy. You might not see us, but you’ll definitely feel the difference in your day-to-day work.”
“Keeping your business running like a well-oiled machine—no squeaks, no leaks.”
Objection: “What if I like some squeaks and leaks in my tech?”
Response: “For those, we offer our ‘glitch of the month’ service! Just kidding. Trust us, things are a lot more fun when everything’s running smoothly.”
Response: “You’ll be amazed at how much better it feels when your tech isn’t doing its own thing. Just like a car, smooth tech makes the journey way easier.”
“When your tech’s a wreck, we’re the fix-it pros with fast solutions and zero judgment.”
Objection: “I’m honestly a bit embarrassed about my current setup…”
Response: “No worries! We’re here to help, not judge. We’ve seen everything, and we love bringing setups up to speed without pointing fingers.”
Response: “Look, we’re pros. The crazier the setup, the more satisfying it is to help make it work. We got you.”
“We’re the IT version of a security blanket—minus the lint.”
Objection: “But I think I need something tougher than a blanket.”
Response: “Our blanket is built tough! It’s full of security layers, proactive monitoring, and encrypted everything. Cozy and safe.”
Response: “We’re as warm and fuzzy as you need, but we don’t mess around with protection. Think of it as a security blanket made of firewalls and encryption.”
“Imagine tech issues on mute. That’s us.”
Objection: “But what if I actually need to hear from you sometimes?”
Response: “We’re here when you need us. We’ll reach out for the important stuff—no spam, no noise. Just the info that keeps you in the loop.”
Response: “We’re always on call for what matters. Think of us as the friend who only texts when it’s important, never just to spam you.”
“We’re here so you can stop Googling, ‘why is my computer doing this?’”
Objection: “But I like Googling my tech issues… it’s educational!”
Response: “You’re welcome to keep at it, but with us, you won’t have to. Consider us your personal tech search engine—minus the contradictory answers.”
Response: “Google’s great, but we’re faster, more reliable, and we can guarantee you won’t end up on random forums at 2 a.m. wondering if ‘disk errors’ are serious.”
“Think of us as your digital bodyguard—without the sunglasses or attitude.”
Objection: “So, you’re not intimidating at all?”
Response: “Nope, we’re here to support, not scare. You get the power of security without the attitude. And our team’s a bit more fun.”
Response: “Bodyguard without the sunglasses or the brooding look! Just the protection, no ego attached.”
“Your goals are our goals. We make sure IT is the least exciting part of your day.”
Objection: “I kind of like when IT makes my day interesting…”
Response: “Then you’ll love working with us! Interesting without tech issues, though—because believe me, there’s plenty of interesting beyond that.”
Response: “IT can be smooth and interesting! Think of us as the quiet foundation that lets you focus on the fun stuff.”
“We keep your business moving, so the only downtime you worry about is vacation.”
Objection: “What about planned downtime?”
Response: “We make sure any downtime is handled quickly and smoothly. The only downtime you’ll worry about is the vacation kind!”
Response: “Planned downtime is part of the deal, but we handle it like pros so it never disrupts your workday.”
“Your IT isn’t supposed to be ‘quirky’—we’ll keep it steady, stable, and secure.”
Objection: “But quirky tech has character!”
Response: “We get it! But when you’re relying on things to work, reliability beats ‘quirky’ any day. Let’s save the personality for the rest of your brand!”
Response: “We love character—but for tech, stability wins. And trust us, your quirky factor will come through even without weird tech!”
“You do your job, we’ll make sure tech doesn’t make it harder.”
Objection: “What if my job gets harder without IT surprises?”
Response: “The only way your job gets harder is if you like firefighting tech issues! But I think you’ll find smooth sailing is a lot better.”
Response: “A smooth day can still be exciting! You’ll have way more time to focus on what you’re great at without tech getting in the way.”
“Tech crisis? Just think of us as your on-call emergency tech squad.”
Objection: “Emergency tech squad? Sounds expensive.”
Response: “We work like an emergency squad but on a budget that won’t hurt. Fast response, affordable support, no drama attached.”
Response: “Think of us as tech support on speed dial—ready to go without a huge price tag attached.”
“Outsource your IT stress to us. You deserve a good night’s sleep.”
Objection: “Can I really outsource my stress?”
Response: “Absolutely! It’s like outsourcing laundry, but for your tech. We handle the tough stuff so you don’t have to.”
Response: “Consider us your de-stress button. Click us in, and you’re free to work without all the tech anxiety.”
“We’re the tech heroes that quietly keep your business a zero-drama zone.”
Objection: “A zero-drama zone? Is that possible?”
Response: “With us, yes! We take the drama out of IT so you can focus on everything else that matters.”
Response: “Less drama, more reliability! We make sure tech just works, no theatrics necessary.”
“Let us handle the IT so you can do what you do best. We’re all about freeing up your focus.”
Objection: “But what if I want to handle it myself?”
Response: “You always can, but we’re here to make it easier! Focus on what you do best, and leave the rest to us.”
Response: “If you’d rather spend your time elsewhere, we’re happy to jump in and keep things running.”
“No IT mishaps on our watch. Call us the ‘silent partners’ for your success.”
Objection: “But what if there are IT mishaps?”
Response: “That’s why we’re here! We make sure mishaps are handled quickly and don’t disrupt your flow.”
Response: “IT mishaps are rare with us around, and if they happen, we’re ready to make them vanish.”
“If tech is stressing you out, it’s time to call in the pros.”
Objection: “I can handle stress!”
Response: “Tech stress isn’t fun, though! Let us take it off your plate so you can handle the important stuff.”
Response: “You’ll be amazed how good it feels without it. Give it a try, you might just love it!”
“We turn IT chaos into calm, like a digital spa day for your business.”
Objection: “A digital spa day sounds… expensive.”
Response: “Not at all! Our services are affordable, relaxing your tech stress without breaking the bank.”
Response: “Consider us your all-in-one IT spa: calm, reliable, affordable.”
“Stop fighting with your tech. We make sure it works for you, not against you.”
Objection: “I can fight my tech if I want!”
Response: “Sure! But wouldn’t it be better if your tech was fighting for you, not against you?”
Response: “We’re here to keep things smooth so your energy can go into your work, not your tech battles.”
